Motherfucking puppies on a plane!!!

So.

Leaving for Toronto today. At the god awful time of 6am. I had to be here at 4. That’s AM people. In the morning. Guess when I finished packing? That’s right. Midnight. Because I’m badness like that. And I was out of town until 7pm.

So. First.

Meeting last night with Jamie. Went better then expected?  I only cried a little bit. And didn’t scream or yellbat all. Though I did through a few French fries. And maybe groveled a little. What can I say. I still love him. I am not sure how it will all turn out honestly. But I did tell him I had recorded him threatening suicide one time I wouldn’t hesitate to call the cops and report him for being a suicide risk. I also would call his mother. He then called me a bitch. So I think he took that seriously.

So. That took the better partook an hour.

I went to bed at around…. never. How are you supposed to sleep that close to when you need to be there so fucking early.

Get to the airport. Have the dog. He is going with me on the plane. I know. I must be crazy. Every one is Gushing over him. He of course is shaking like a leaf. In a tornado. On speed.

So. Get through security and the interaction happens like this :

Security person : Do you need help?

Me: I don’t think so. He only weighs 6 pounds. And my purse is pretty purse like.
Her : I meant with putting your dog in the kennel.

Me: Now?

Her :  Yes

Me: I don’t think so….

I then proceed to sit on the floor,  holding my dog and trying to make him get I  this newfangled soft sided kennel. It went like this….

Me: Time to get in the crate.

Asher : Fuck you.

Me: Common. It’s only for a few hours. Well. Three and a half. Ish. If we are lucky.

Asher : Fuck. You.

Me: The nice lady says you have to.

Asher : Fuck her too then.

Me : Get in the motherfucking bag aol we can gte on the motherfucking plane.

Asher: Yup can’t make me!

Massive struggles ensued.

I finally grabbed all his legs,  flipped him on his back and shoved him in facw first.

Me: HA!  I win asshole!!!!

*glares*

He didn’t make any noise thwarted rest of the waiting period. He only flopped around a bit in his crate as we took off.

Then he let his anal glands release a bit.

Well played soggy. Well played.

And that’s why I can’t travel anywhere.

image

sunrise over Saskatoon.

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Tuesday is travel day !

So. Tuesday are supposed to be about travel. Anything and everything about travel.

So.

I actually HAVE traVel news. On the 18th I am flying from Saskatoon to Toronto.

Why you ask ? I didn’t know you cared !

I am headed to visit family. My fathers entire aide of my family live there. Ans the majority of my mother’s.

Honestly the only close( read direct) family on my mothers side is my mom, oma and brother. My mom has a few cousins and uncles that live in bc and Alberta… but I barely know them.

In Ontario I have my other brother , father, about 19 cousins and when a bunch of their kids. Plus aunts and uncles , grandparents and other ransom relatives and you have the entire population of Southern Ontario. Swear to god.

Anyways the main excuse door going to visit is one of my cousins is doing the isle walks. Not  the death walk like in the Atwater. The other life as you know it ending experience. Marriage.

My cousins and jigs bride have been chosenbe on 4 weddings Canada.  Which is a reality show. Where four brides go to each others weddings and judge the food , dress ,  venue , and experience. The bride that has the most points at the end gets a free all expense paid trip somewhere. No one knows where until the winner opens her envelope.

So yeah. Now that I have given an unsponsered pump to the show…

While there I also plan on visiting Toronto, seeing family and hanging our with my brother. He is epicly awesome.

I’m going to be going for two whole weeks. And I’m taking my dog with me.

But I will save observations on how that will work out for next week.

image

Acheron

Today is suicide prevention day.

What keeps me here? I wonder that every day. 

 

“I’m not as strong as you think I am. I’m just a coward – with no exit plan”

 

So that might be my reason. I am too much of a coward to actually take any steps in either direction. Maybe.

 

Also just figured out that reading about other peoples depression and suicide stories is defiantly a trigger for me. I’m going to bed.

Rabbit spork army

Recently I was a part of a comment love blog post thing. It was through Swap Bot The point of the swap  was to submit your blog and another person would read and comment in a positive way. Well as positive as one could be while commenting on my blog.

I got paired with a lovely lady whom I believe was from the Netherlands. Her blog was in two languages . Well what I take to be her native tounge and an english translation.

Her blog talks about a project she finally got around to finishing. Bunny. Puppets. I was naturally pretty stoked with the idea and commented that she should make a pattern so that other people could also make bunnies.

Of course, because my idea was so fucking awesome she responded that maybe she would make a pattern for it. My thought process degrades from there….

Oh yes! Bunny patern!

I could make a whole bunch of them.

A virtual bunny army.

I could arm them with sporks.

A terrorizing spork wielding bunny army to help me take over the world!

Muhahahahaha!

At this point I started to get weird looks from the people I was staying with. Not only was my nefarious plan no longer top secret because I
just planed it outloud… but my attempt at doing an evil cackle totally set the dogs barking.

But that has to be one of my best evil takeover plans to date. Totally.

No sponsors were offended or offered for this post.

Sooo – since I seem to have Lawsbian friends who are convinced to show me up….

I am going to try and do what Lindz is going to do… http://thehouseofcole.blogspot.de/2012/09/the-30-day-commitmentagain.html 

That means… a daily blog post. Hopefully of things that are a little lighter? I got told I was too… bleak/grumpy/bitchy/whiny on here. Go figure. Me. Being emotionally honest on MY FUCKING BLOG. 

Soooo….

 

Monday… um.. lemme check – 

Mazel Tov Monday – for throwing the focus on someone else…another blog, another writer, someone I feel like pointing the good job stick at.

Travel Tuesday – for travel related posts.

Wordless Wednesday – an idea borrowed from The Bloggess, for photos or doodles meant to inspire or confuse. (Even if you’ve had a blog for a while, like me, this video is still super helpful.)

Thankful Thursday – because gratitude doesn’t always come naturally.

Whatever I Feel Like Friday 

Secret Saturday – for telling you secrets just to make you feel special for popping by 🙂

Sunday (sorry, no fun alliterational title) – lessons learned during the week, because it should never stop, right?

Anyone else think this is a effort in frutility? Is that a word? Spell check says not. Huh. And now I cannot change the word to the right way because then? This ENTIRE paragraph would not make any sense. 

 

Anyways. I am also going to try and be a bit funnier. AND since I think that being funnier would make the world stop – and probably isn’t humanly possible…. I will put a password on my rantings. So only those who want to care can read them. Or something. I will probably forget. Err… What?

 

Has anyone seen the show Reaper? Fucking funny. Watched it when it came out… and now again on Netflix. Also – Better off Ted. Funny. 😀

Also? I have to pee. 

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